Could the Segway have a chance at maturity?

We were all disappointed when Dean Kamen, after a goddamned YEAR of hype, dropped the Segway Personal Transporter and not the Kamen Personal Replicator. And the first time I was driving and saw one of these things on the streets, my reaction was pure rage followed by a strong urge to jerk the wheel to the right and murder Mr. Disposable-Income. As you know they sold far below the level of initial expectation, unless Kamen was lying to the media about sales targets.

Today I was reading The Atlantic, which is like the fifth magazine or paper I’ve seen this month with a sidebar on forcast oil prices. The predictions are all over the place, but basically no one will be surprised if gas reaches $9 a gallon in five years. Because: we’re using two gallons for every gallon we pull out of the earth, and China’s fuel demands are way up. That’s the bad news barring major pipeline attacks, intra-US terror, nuclear war, etc. So maybe people will start buying Segways. Why? Because you can ride on the sidewalk. Serious. I’ve seen electric cars around LA, and they’re scary – below the level of a H1′s hood, no airbags, Pow-Pow-Power Wheels style. It makes sense to have a Segway if gas costs a fortune and other people have Segways so you don’t look like a total ass. Unless of course you had a wooden spoon as a transitional object instead of a teddy bear in which case you don’t care what anyone thinks.

You’re a big fine woman won’t you back that ass up / go on girl won’t you back that ass up