Ugly Nutrition

Update: I wrote this last night and wasn’t going to post it, but I saw a Red Bull commercial that plays on cannibalism and it pushed me over the edge. So:

Is it just me, or has it been a big year for cannibals? Nathalie was obsessed with anthropomorphized food for a while, which I consider to be a latent expression of a cannibalistic tendency, Kevin Ray Underwood killed and planned to eat a 10-year-old girl and kept a particularly banal blog (“Single, bored, and lonely, but other than that, pretty happy”)…Armin Meiwes, perhaps the most respectful cannibal on record, managed to block the release (in Germany) of Butterfly, a movie about his case; one potential victim went so far as to allow himself to be tied up before he changed his mind about being killed – Meiwes untied him and they went to the movies together. (Rammstein wrote a song about Meiwes called Mein Teil or “My Piece” (Well, “my dick.”))

The next step is cannibalism without death. We have Hufu, previously covered, but that’s nothing – wait until cloned beef hits the market. After that it’s a skip and a jump to cruelty-free human flesh. It would taste, as is well known, like good, fully-developed veal.

To be clear: I find this all terribly upsetting.